Cars in your life – know your man/women through them

You know you can tell a lot about the guy/girl you are with by the transport they have:

No car – can’t drive, poor, may be an alcoholic

Small car – poor, maybe miser, short or driving someone else’s car

Family car – already have a family (the child seat in back is usually a dead give away) or still living at home and borrowing

Sports car – little willy, but compensating. Not sure if you r a girl

Bus – see no car

Truck – I don’t know

Motor bike – watch out, your parents won’t like them. If it is a women possible a “bitch on a bike”

Moped – how do I know you are gay or perhaps ethnic

One thing to watch out for though is a guy/girl in Company Car clothing (as they can be hiding their true personality - you may really be with a moped kind of person).

So here’s my list:

Triumph Herald (small car) – this car was a classic. Had the old lift to the front kind of bonnet (most of you are too young to ever have seen one). Hand me down from mum/dad. Reliable little car but would have been classed as gay. Served me well for a number of years and was cleaned up (by the spewees) on more than one occasion. Don’t recall ever getting laid in it though so it clearly had no pulling power.

Ford Cortina (4 Door) – saved my life. This car was actually 2 cars welded together by my dad (thank you). It was the car that left the road to become a plane/submarine. It is perhaps only because it was so strong in the mid section that I managed to walk away. Again this car had no pulling power as far as I can remember.

Ford V8 Falcon (302) – now you say how can someone who crashes a slow car graduate to an even faster car. Not sure, but I needed to get laid. All – let me tell you it works. For some reason girls seem to like fast cars, plus there is more room to get your leg over or to go elsewhere (like down south). This car managed to get me laid on a first date and it took me to distant regions to get laid on a number of occasions. It had the misfortune of having a back wheel wind out of the transmission one day coming down high road and the car gently sitting on the road. Lucky part was the day before it had come home from the regions at over 100mph for most of the way.

Toyota Corolla and then Toyota Corona – moving into family territory I think. Corolla was a good little car. Corona shit itself at 90k. Everything failed including the marriage. The Corolla had a story. We sold it to a car yard, but we had to take it home while they got our next car ready. I drive it down our street (past some kids at the top), park and open the door. Kid about 13 rides straight into it and bends door nearly in half. He is sitting on ground dazed and i am thinking OMG what do i do now i dont own this car (no thought for the little F... on the floor at least at the time). Ever since that day i always check for bikes and as a rider i am constantly looking out for the door. As it turns out he was ok, even if his bike was a little bent - serves him right i say for chasing parked cars.

Nissan NXR (sports car - not sure if the little willy thing fits but only others can truly tell) – yes it was my “redundancy” gift to myself. Worked ok when there was just Ash and I but this is not a family car. So it had to go less than 12 months later when the family re-grew from 2-4 and sometimes 5 (when Paul came to visit). I am not sure if it had pulling power as I never tested it, but it is highly likely it did.

Nissan Pulsar hatch – yep u guessed it family car – wouldn’t have pulled in a fit

Nissan Pathfinder (company car) – fun while it lasted – might have pulled a country girl

Mitsubishi Magna (company car) – I liked it. Seems I am well past pulling

Holden Berlina (company car) – had a supercharger but it never got out of 3rd gear. Just made me feel better

Holden SV6 (current company car) – nice car

Hyundai Getz (second car) – currently used by Paul (see no car and small car).

I currently getting around on a racingbike (which is worth more than my first 2 cars - together) so i am not sure what that says about me - but here's a stab. Fat guy (not really), Alcoholic (possibly but who isnt really), environmentalist (depends on the bike - not really in this case), poor (generally applies if a student)