1995 - 1997 - life in the country

in mid 1995 i got a job in a regional area of WA (the Gascoyne region) and we moved to Carnarvon. In the end this turned out to be a great move, but it wasnt without its challenges. For a start I ended up in court but perhaps more challenging is "migrating" to a new place. God knows how people move away from families to new continents "forever".

the girls were young, and despite having lived in the country sue was relatively naive. We took food which was actually cheaper on the supermarket shelves in the town we went to (we might just have got lucky).

although we only spent two years there they were good years on reflection. Life was good, the environment was great, we had the party house and some good parties and the kids had some experiences they might never have had and especially some close encounters with animals including Sharks and Snakes as well as flying planes.

Professionally the time was interesting and fulfilling and we met and worked with some great people (Kieran and Cecilia; Chris Jones in particular). On reflection, Carnarvon was a hoot but two years were enough

1994 - a blur

just in case you are wondering - it disappeared and i dont have diaries/records to remind me of any significant events

1995 - the earth tilts

life gets interesting in 1995. I get restless and generally this is a time "eruptions" happen in my life. Work became "boring" and i was looking for some change, but i worked in the Government so change was not its strong suit. I talked to my boss but nothing happened. By mid-year i was getting really restless. I had written a resignation note (unsigned) and stuck it under my blotter. through the year i started to "withdraw" from committees etc which i thought were useless.

One day, it was actually a turning point in my (and our lives), the CEO of the agency turns up in my office and "instructs" me to rejoin a committee i had withdrawn from. We had a polite conversation and he left - fully thinking i would be "instructed". Unfortunately for him, but fortunately for me, i signed my letter and resigned that day.

I had no job to go to, but i wasnt worried.

when i got home and told Sue what i had done, she wasnt that happy. her feeling was we should have discussed it before i did it.

My view was that it was my call. But i do recognise i could have put us all at risk.

As fate would have it - the proverbial genie came out of nowhere and put us back on track.

my take from this is that, generally, if you have the balls to follow your instinct life will look after you

1993 - a hot year

i might be considered by most to be hot, but any new relationship usually heats things up. We spent lots of times in playgrounds (that were hot) and pizza bars (they were hot too).

The NXR was hot - especially with the roof down.

the kids really were babies so in a way life just "got in the way" and we gradually shifted, as everyone does, back to warm.

In 1993 we bought our first "house". it was impetuous, but it served us well.

1993 was the start of a new era

1993 - another new start

life is about change (even if it seemingly stays the same). the backend of 2002 and early 2003 were the foundation stones of life as we know it today. Ash was just over two and i was circa 34. I was lighter than my current state by nearly 20kgs and i certainly had more hair. I was also in the scheme of things - poor - although i was working. But i had a job, a roof over our heads and food on the table (for the first few months) in restaurants all around town.

Early on in this period Ash and I caught the bus to daycare, i went to work, we ate out on the way home, showered/bathed, went to sleep and then did it all again the next day.

In around March 1993 our house sold and Ash and I moved to Helen's house in Mt Hawthorn. I bought a car (a nissan NXR - great car for 2).

Sue and i started going out seriously around this time - Georgia was ~4 and Paul would have been ~12/13 although he was not with us, as he lived with his Dad in various places in the eastern states and came over, at least in the initial years only at Xmas.

After a while Sue and I spent more and more time together. As we were both renting (or in Sue's case house minding) we eventually decided to move in together. We did not rent together, we basically just bought a house together around October 93 i think.

In retrospect this worked out but it could have been real interesting if our relationship hadnt worked out. As with many of the key choices we have made along the way this purchase was "impetuous" (i am not a great shopper so we did not look around much and at the time i was not that sophisticated in an investment sense) so the decision went a bit like - do you like it/is it fair value/can we afford it (yes) ok its bought.

Everyone will remember different things about this time but my enduring memories are:

• riding on the bus with Ash
• telling alf and allison, Karen and I had split up
• having a birthday party at the Leeming house
• having to take Ash back to her own bed (in Helen's house) because she had a habit of climbing in next to me (and Sue "made" me)
• georgia cowering in the corner, with a cuddly toy or doll, because i had shouted at her for something - crying (not sure why it sticks but it does)
• sue and i getting around in the NXR with the roof down/off
• selling the NXR - it was not a family car (another bad investment but fun while it lasted!!)

When we moved in together we really began the process of trying to join families (or blending them) together. - as most people who have split and get into new relationships can attest this is never easy and we have had, and continue to this day to have, our moments.

the next life

in my life i have really had circa 3 or 4 lives (or compartments of life) these are:

1. 0-18
2. 18 - 25
3. 25-32
4. 32+

I have described/commented on much of the time up to time period 3. so the next life really commences in the period 32+ (circa late 1992/3).

so what happened around this time? my wife Karen and i split and after we sold our house ash (still a very little girl) and i moved into Helen's house in Mt Hawthorn. this was an older house (now worth a squillion) close to the city (and work).

in the February of 1993 i had a birthday party which many people felt was a bit strange. It was in our house and Karen (and her new boyfriend at the time - Dave) and Karen's parents and my family and sue all came (this was less than 3 months after we split up). Looking back it seems a little bit strange (but at the time it was fine).

Around this time Sue and I really started seeing each other seriously and the beginnings of a family started as she had Georgia (about 4) and Paul (older). in the beginning Sue and I, after she split from Brian, would see each other a few nights a week and there was a period when Sue looked after other peoples houses sharing one with Rhonda (a girl involved in basketball).

so the next life (and all of its joys, trials and tribulations) is about to begin

a new (literary) start

I looked at this blog today for first time in ages (you know if you type "this" wrong - often you get shit). some of what i wrote earlier was funny and some challenging, but it really is my story and it does need to be told (at least for me).

The last real post effectively got us to the time when my ex-wife Karen and i separated. This was effectively 15 years ago so much water (and life) has poured under the bridge since then.

So now we are going to meander down the river of life over the past 15 years.

jeff